Had a good weekend. Tim and I went out with friends on Friday night. It was great to see our group of "myspacers". That site has been the best. Saturday night another friend of ours was having his annual Toga party. It was nice to drop in and say hi. He is about the best host I have ever met. Everything is Grecian at his home. He has Marble baseboards, mustard yellow accents in his home. Marble floors and lots of columns in his backyard along with white granite. He puts on the best spread of anyone I have ever known. I have asked him to cater my wedding, which will probably be about the same size as his party. I am expecting it to be about $2000 for food and decorations, but it is so worth it, because he makes things look and feel great.
I have been less than satisfied with my relationship with Tim. More than anything, I think I had some big issues I was not comfortable discussing, but I finally did. I really feel as though our money issues are totally unfair. The biggest thing, is that I somehow want to feel taken care of, which I do not at all, but secondly, I realized that I have paid everytime we have went out for the last couple of months. I pay $200 for housecleaning each month, and buy all the food, which runs about $600 a month. He pays utilities, which this month ran about $600, because of our A/C, but usually they will be around $450-500. He asked me for money for the electricity, which I gave him, but when I asked him if he were broke, he said no, he doesn't like big bills. In addition to these things, every single time we go anywhere he wants to take my Chevy Tahoe and I pay for all the gas. I am completely frustrated about how he doesn't seem to take my finances into consideration. I feel a bit used. We have a client who we will be signing up for a new build. I wanted to go out and get familiar with the community so we would be knowledgeable when we took him there. The sales lady gave us a registration form which is the "get paid" form and Tim put his name on it.
He and I bring home about the same amount of money, but I am supporting 5 kids and he is supporting one. In addition to our split of who pays what I am also paying $350 a month for my rental home. I finally tried talking to him about this, which I mentioned was very difficult. He just said, "Okay, what else." I don't feel like he even understood the stress I am going through.
We are building a pool. We agreed to split everything in half. I was fine with that, because I was selling my home and would have $100K equity. Well, after months of making double mortgage payments I told him I would have to rent it. I asked him the other day if he still wanted me to pay him for the pool. He said yes, and told me it was only a couple of Real Estate deals. I was floored. If this were one thing I wouldn't care, but it is a pattern I have seen for a long time.
I try to be generous with him. I want him to know that I care, but I don't see the same type of care and concern from him. I am really feeling disappointed and that our talk didn't amount to much. I want to give it a few days, and I set some new rules. I told him I don't want him using my credit card anymore, because he will pay for us to go out with it, but when the bill comes I end up paying it. I am going to set up an accout for all our groceries, pest control, housecleaning, and utilities and we can each contribute half. After I told him it bothered me about contributing to the utilities, he said he wouldn't ask anymore, but that is still not fair, because I am putting out a lot more money on the other above mentioned things.
I feel like he is greedy and selfish, and upon writing this I realize I need to talk to him somemore, becuase I will not marry someone that I feel this way about.

Title: Working with Morons

I love my job. It is the best. I get to go to new places, meet new people, and everyday is different, but on occasion I have to deal with a client who is unreasonable or another agent who is incompetent. Today I closed a transaction that has been in escrow since April 2nd. The other agent was a complete moron, not to mention totally unprofessional. I could never get a return call back, had to call his broker twice and wanted to ring his neck on a regular basis. I am so glad to be finished, I just wish I could get his license taken away since he is so incompetent that he is dangerous.

CA Visit
Had a great time visiting my family. My sister and her hubby were very gracious by putting me and my 5 kids up. Also, she arranged to have our reunion at her friends house which worked out perfect. The kids were able to play and swim. It was a beautiful and relaxing place to be.
Had a great time visiting the amusement parks with my kids, although my 16 year old had a bad attitude all day at Legoland. I can't blame him for that. It is really for little guys, but I am glad we went.

It is nice to be home. It was great to see Tim. I love him dearly. He was happy to see me too. I really appreiciate his helpfulness when it comes to my kids and me. Today he babysat in the morning while I had to work and this afternoon he picked up one of my checks on the way to work. He is very helpful and I need to remind myself to be appreciative about all the help he offers me in my life.

I am going out to visit with my friends tomorrow night. It will be great to see them. It has been three weeks and it will be nice to catch up.

Well, it is almost time for the dreaded 12 hour drive. I am about to tuck my kids in and try to get some sleep tonight. Deana, sorry there is so much going on. I wish things were more spread out, but lets just hope for babies. Two of my kids are going to the midnight viewing of Spiderman so they should be sleeping most of the morning! Well, not much else to say. We are all packed up and just need to put food and drink in the truck before we leave. Wish me safe travels.

Sometimes life is hard. Yesterday was Father's Day. I listened to my boyfriend tell me that his son chose to spend the day with his mother and her new husband. This is after two weeks ago he told me if I would schedule dinner around him he would come. I was thinking he wouldn't show because I had tried twice to find out what time and he didn't respond, which by the way makes me not like him very much. It isn't the first time he has blown me or his father off.
His daughter, who was out of town and I had suggested she take him to lunch or make him a card, did not. She did text message him. Maybe this should be enough. Maybe I am making too much out of this, but I felt bad for him.
I think his son is mad because his dad made him move in with his mother after graduation. He had said he would never live with us, so we planned accordingly and when we moved in we were one room short. I suppose I should be more understanding of his feelings. Maybe in a year or two things will settle down. Right now he shows no respect or courtesy for Tim or myself. I guess it is best to let it go.
My daughter and I are still not talking. Boy, my life sometimes feels like a mess! I am okay with it. I love her and I know she loves me and when one of us is ready to talk we will. Until then I am enjoying not being asked to help out or listen to her. She is very selfish and it is hard dealing with that at times.
Besides those things everything is good. My house will be rented the first of July, which comes close to covering my mortgage payment. I have my Brokers license now, which is great. I am trying to read the book " the Power of NOW", but it is so deep. It is a bit hard for me to understand.
I am going stir crazy with my kids. Having them home all summer with no breaks stinks. I have to laugh at myself for saying this, because I was married for 17 years and never got any breaks, but now that I am divorced and used to every other weekend to myself I can't help but miss the quiet time. I enjoy having time with just me and my boyfriend and time to work without interuptions. I am upset that there father can leave for the entire summer and not somehow compensate me. I feel like she should pay more support so I could afford a sitter or his new wife should take them, but that isn't reality so I am not going to focus on it too much.
I am looking forward to our trip to CA this summer, minus the drive. It will be fun to go to amusement parks and just get away. I think it will be great for Tim, too, to have some peace and quiet for a week. I am already wondering what type of projects he will get done around the house. He is good about keeping busy, just like me.
Well, that is all for now.

Difficult children. I have a daughter, my oldest of six. She moved out when she was 16 and went to live with her dad. We had been going through a divorce and in all honesty I was a wreck. I stopped being the Eagle Eye mom and became caught up in my own issues, allowing my daughter to take advantage. This went on for five months. If I would go out she would have friends over and they would drink and smoke. After five months I began to get my bearings enough to start enforcing the rules. When I sat my daughter down and told her that the rules never changed, but that I was now going to start enforcing them again she flipped and told me I hadn't been for months and that she would just go live with her father. I was very hurt by this, but quickly realized it was not all bad. She has always been very headstrong and very demanding. She is great at manipulating people and situations. My house ran much smoother and I didn't have her trying to turn all the other kids against me. We still saw each other. Mostly she just came around when she wanted something. It is now a year and a half later. I have enjoyed our relationship most of the time except when she starts asking for things, which happens everytime we see her. Whether it is our furniture, or a vehicle that she thinks my boyfriend should give her or her boyfriend. Well, a couple of months she moved out of her dads house and in with her boyfrined. Because I had recently got engaged and was buying a house with my boyfriend we had tons of extra furniture, so we gave her everything she needed to set up a home from silverware, plates, couches, coffee tables, patio furniture, decorations. You name it she had it. She borrowed my truck to get some of it over there and when she didn't bring my truck back she got mad at me for asking when she would be home. She never offered to pay for gas and hardly said thank you. When her car broke down she asked me if she could borrow one of ours. I told her yes. I also transported her back and forth to the dealership twice to get it repaired. When her and her friends wanted to go to Rocky Point Mexico she asked if I would take them and I did. The point I am making, is everytime she has needed anything I have tried to be there for her.
Her father is out of state for the summer, so I have the kids all summer. This Saturday I had planned a day out for Tim and I. I had asked Megan if she would watch the kids. Hoping she would do it for free, because she knows I am broke, and I just paid her $100 to watch her siblings two weeks ago and then their dad ended up having them all day, but she hemmed and hawed about watching them, so I hired one of her friends. She just found out last night. She was pissed and told me she is sick of me and that after we go to California this summer she is through with me. I am very hurt and stunned by her cruel words. This is the daughter that comes to my house and sneeks in when I am not home and has sex with her boyfrined in my bed, the daughter that takes my things never to return them unless I notice they are gone, the daughter who doesn't understand how rude it is to constantly ask my boyfriend and myself for things everytime she sees us.
I feel like I have failed. I don't understand how she can be so selfish and mean. I am hoping that as time passes she will change her way of thinking, because right now I think she is rotten.

Well, where to start? Had a great time in Rocky Point, Mexico last week. It was fun hanging out with 10 single people. We all got wild and crazy but no one crossed any boundries and we all laughed our asses off. Living with Tim is going well. We have our moments, but overall we seem to be working things out. I am stessing that my house has not sold and that I am almost broke making $4500 a month mortgage payments for the last two months. I had someone put an application in to rent my home, which I decided I would do last week as a last resort, but there fico scores were so low and there rental history was no good, so I didn't want to take the chance. I am getting my summer schedule set up. We will spend a week in CA visiting 3 amusement parks and attending a family get together. We will also visit the waterpark at least once and the movies a couple of times and Katchner Caverns. In September I am taking my kids to Rocky Point. We just reserved a house on the beach. They loved it last time we were there and my oldest kids can have a margarita with us at the local bars which is nice.
Well, it is time for me to tuck my rascals in and get the house picked up before big daddy comes home.

Well, It has been a busy week, but a busy good week. I thought I should take the time to write since I usually write when I am frustrated and need to vent. My son graduated kindergarten on Wednesday and my daughter graduated high school on Thursday. Tim's mother flew in on Monday and my mom flew in on Tuesday. I think we were all a bit stressed. I had met his mother before and he had met mine, but none of us knew each other very well. For the first two days it felt like two different families sharing one house. I didn't know any of the people his mother was talking about and vise versa. By the third day things seemed a bit more relaxed and then my mom flew home with my youngest son. All my kids have been spending the night at friends houses so it has felt like a total vacation for the last couple of days. I have slept in which has been the best.
I leave for Mexico on Thursday. I was really bummed about the timing because I was supposed to start my period the day we left. For the first time ever I am thrilled to get my cycle early. I started today, which means by Thursday I will be about done. No cramping or worrying about a messy swim suit. yeah! I am thrilled. On top of that I got another listing today. It makes listing number 5. Now if I can only get one or two them them sold I would be tickled pink.
I did get a buyer under contract this week and we just got through the inspection period, so I am happy with that. That will close end of June and will most likely be my next paycheck. I have another under contract which is in probate and has been for two months. What a nightmare that has been.
Oh, I am officially engaged. My ring is beautiful. I tried taking a photo for my sister, but it looks horrible and blurry, so she will have to wait to see it. The proposal was nothing special, but like my good friend reminded me, Tim has been very good about the big things, like me taking time to date other people and figure out what I needed. I love him a lot and am happy to have him in my life.
I don't think I have slept in more than twice in the two years of my divorce and woke up feeling relaxed, but I have twice this week. It is nice having someone to share joy with and burdens. I think we are good for each other.
Well, that is about all for now. I think I will call my little guy in CA and see how he is doing.